It seems the roller coaster ride of the final semester in college saves its fastest loops and largest dips for the homestretch. In the past week, I've gone from considering grad school to forgetting about it, considering a second degree to forgetting about it, and from thinking that loan payments would be manageable to wanting to "ring some necks" in the financial aid office (I use that figurative phrase figuratively! It is meant to exhibit my frustration with the attitudes I encountered while fulfilling a graduation requirement today and nothing more--italics are meant only for emphasis, not for sarcasm.)
Our university has decided that exit counseling (an online service through studentloans.gov) should no longer be a requirement that is completed online at the student's convenience. Instead, the graduating seniors are required to schedule an appointment with the Financial Aid office to complete the online counseling with an aid officer literally looking over their shoulders. "It's an attempt to educate graduates and prevent them for defaulting on their loans," I was told when I got enough nerve to ask why they had changed their policy regarding this counseling during my appointment this past Monday. A.K.A.? They feel the need to babysit upcoming graduates, and while I don't mind being helped or informed, there's something seriously insulting about having someone sit behind me as I read information about loans and wait impatiently for me to finish the counseling-- she even pointed out where answers were in the text when I was taking "too long" to read the information. I don't do well with anything when I have someone over my shoulder- reading, writing, school work, anything. Add to this the fact that she required me to sign up for the loan payment that would enable me to repay the loans the quickest but also had the highest payment per month (over $300/month, how many new graduates can afford that and still afford basic essentials??) and I think it's fair to say I was a little more than annoyed during this appointment. I repeatedly scoffed about amounts, directly addressed her side comments about my change of major and my reluctance to enter the workforce with an English: Creative Writing degree, and at the end had to bite my tongue to stop the response to her, "Congratulations on completing your degree!!" from making it past my lips.
After I left the office, I had to distract myself in order to not "fly off the handle"as Galinda says to Elphie in the musical WICKED. That meant a lot of walking, ranting, cussing, and even crying. Watching the roommates play video games where they could shoot things helped a little, too. I also discovered that my recently hatched plan to return for a second Bachelor's in Environmental Science was- to use the expression of my Aquatics professor- "squelched" because the course/credit requirements required that I return to school for a minimum of two years (not one year like I initially thought) and because I was told during my frustrating financial aid meeting that the only "aid" I would recieve would be additional loans.........AND THIS WAS ONLY MONDAY.
This week was also filled to the brim with academic assignments (we have officially hit the moment when professors start screaming, "Oh, shit! I don't have enough grades in the book!! Assign alllllll the homework!!!!!!" I'd just barely complete one assignment on time before rushing off to scribble out another paper, another research assignment, a Spanish exercise, and most important of all, my senior Capstone project- which I will present in just over two weeks in order to graduate in December. It's been an absolute mess trying to complete two versions of this Capstone (required for the English Department as well as the Honors Program), but as of Wednesday night, I was given the very solid deadline of next Thursday.... by next Thursday, the Honors version of my Capstone must be completed. So, by next Thursday, for better or worse, the stupid thing will be done.
My project consists of three original Appalachian short stories (one with plans to be expanded into a novella) and a reflective paper on the creative writing process. I'm interested to see how my chaotic trips to various settings, continual playing of iTunes playlists in the background while writing, and recent personal events influence this project. This weekend is my last chance to knock this thing out of the park, and it's only the fact that I'm writing about the place I love, my West Virginia, that keeps me from becoming so overwhelmed I can no longer function.
Though this coming next week is the homestretch for my Senior Capstone, it certainly isn't the end of my remaining classes, all of which have their own demands. But hey, that's what Thanksgiving Break is for right? .......right????....... I can promise that my break will include no "academic break" other than on Thursday, when I'll spend the day at my aunt and uncle's farm in Seneca Rocks, eating amazing food, being surrounded by wonderful people, and relaxing in the beautiful mountains. Hopefully being back home will remind me why I chose Appalachian fiction at my Senior Capstone-- because I love my small town and her natural beauty.
But before I begin this week-long cram session before the last two weeks of my semester, I am planning to have some fun in the form of attending a production of the musical RENT with some amazing friends. This semester would have been impossible to get through without them- they've handled the breakdowns, the tears, the terrifying confessions, and the rants and still managed to keep me going. So next Friday, after the Capstone has been turned in, and I've loaded up my car for Thanksgiving break, I'm taking a night to myself and my friends before coming home and kicking my mile-long homework list in the butt. And it will be awesome. :)
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